How often have you heard someone ‘wishing’ for something over an extended period of time without doing anything to support the wish? Do you see these people getting results?
Could there be other approaches to creating the qualities and attributes you want in life?
We have all wished for something at some point in our lives. I have a friend whom I love dearly who has been having health problems for several years. He does not like doing any type of sport but really enjoys smoking and drinking alcohol on a regular basis.
Every time we speak, he says he ‘wishes; he could feel better and have a healthier lifestyle. He’s been wishing for that since I met him seven years ago!
Wishing is a word that I personally avoid using. As presented by Edward T. Hall in his book The Hidden Dimension, quoting anthropologist Benjamin Lee Whorf:
“Language is more than just a medium for expressing thought. It is, in fact, a major element in the formation of thought”.
That one phrase has revolutionised my life.
The language you use to formulate your thinking will inevitably affect the way you represent those thoughts.
Exceptionally effective people know this. They use words like ‘can’, ‘will’, ‘want’, and ‘choose’ when they communicate their outcomes.
Assuming you can access one, listen to the words they choose when they speak.
Here is a thought experiment: how do you react when say the following:
I wish my life was better
I should be a better person
I can’t get this to work
And:
I can improve my life
I will become a better person
I choose to achieve my outcomes
Which of these two sets of examples is more empowering?
Do you think professional golfer Greg Norman used to go out on the course thinking I wish I could win the PGA Tour today?
So, next time you find yourself wishing for something, it’s only fair enough that you at least give yourself the chance to be able to achieve it, by changing the way you use your language.
Now it’s your turn! take your next step towards Exceptional Effectiveness., Start small first and see it for yourself. It will change your life, just like it changed mine.,
Remember, this is practical advice, not just another theory, so do go out and try it, and let me know how you went.
Edited by Jules Collingwood.
Learn more about NLP by reading our Ultimate Compendium of NLP
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